From the moment we're conceived, we need to trust the adults around us to be there. Mom in particular at first. A baby grows in her body. Later, if she's nursing, her very body is in tune with the infant, responding to changes in growth patterns, producing more food as the baby demands it.
Any mom will tell you it's a whole lot easier doing this with another adult on the premises, supporting every part of the activity.
Children are made from one man and one woman. It doesn't matter to me what science may be able to change about that. It won't generate possibilities more than it will generate confusion. We'll have a lot of 'splainin' to do to those products of conception, especially if they are smarter than us, because they were scientifically designed that way.
Children thrive when there are two adults committed to looking after them, because one adult cannot do it very well by him or herself. By committed, I mean until death parts them, the adults from each other as well as the child.
From our teen years, we seek the one person with whom we can spend the rest of our lives. Why is that? Is it just a fairy-tale romantic notion that there would be someone out there to whom we could be permanently attached? Or is it something built into us, making it possible for the offspring of that attachment to know that the adults around them will be there, no matter what, barring disaster out of their control? What is there about that security that is so important to a child?
Children need a mom and a dad. And it is arrogant to think that we, individually, have everything a child needs. Dads can't nurse a baby. Moms don't have the power to provide for a child like a dad can if she's nursing a baby. "Oh, excuse me, honey, you're just going to have to put aside those hunger pangs and be quiet while I (shoot, butcher and cook this gazelle) / (am in this business meeting)" No, babies don't do that.
Here's my premise: The most basic family value is a child's ability trust and believe that the adults who brought that child into the world will, barring natural disaster, be there together under the same roof until natural disaster (death) really does part them. The second family value is that those parents will love that child, putting themselves between the child and disaster.
Family values don't come easily. Human beings don't naturally mate for life like some members of the animal kingdom. We have to learn to treat each other well. We have to learn how to be good enough to commit to a life-long relationship. Our example is God Himself, who loves us no matter what, knows EVERYTHING we do, knows that the spirit is willing and the flesh is weak, and did indeed put Himself between us and disaster. We do well to study the words that He wrote to us, the examples that He preserved for us, including the good, bad, and ugly about us. His rules are pretty simple, but not one of us can keep only one of those rules. I'll paraphrase them here for modern readers, and I encourage you to look up the original wording and all the commentary the Bible provides.
1. There are no other gods. There's only God.
2. Don't try to make a god out of anything else.
3. Don't speak evil of God.
4. Let God show you that He can provide for you one day each week. Honor God and take a sabbath off from work, and don't make anyone else work on that day, either.
5. Honor mom and dad. (Specifically named as "father and mother".)
6. Don't murder.
7. Don't have sex with anyone other than your spouse.
8. Don't steal.
9. Don't lie to get someone in trouble, and don't fail to tell the truth when someone is in trouble.
10. Don't want what's not yours.
These rules, combined with wisdom, which is what the rest of the Bible is all about, will keep us safe from most man-made disasters. Those are the ones that destroy people, relationships, and families. God added that if as a society we pursue justice and righteousness, that He would withhold many natural disasters. People would live long, productive lives and be able to celebrate the births of their great-grandkids. I believe this!
Notice there's no commandment to send your child to school. Not anywhere in the Bible is there such a commandment. In fact, the Bible tells PARENTS to raise and teach their kids. It tells kids to seek wisdom.
In some other post I'll discuss why we have schools at all. My last post proposed that schools are places to warehouse children while parents, both of them, are out earning an income, and that the income is more important than the children. Schools will teach what is important to society, and so schools teach both boys and girls how to earn an income.
No, there is nothing wrong with that. Both boys and girls need to learn how to earn an income.
What's wrong is that schools don't support family values. In some cases, schools actively undermine family values. It's what you get when parents fail to direct the child's education.
Schools operate under the premise that they know better than the parent about what's best for the child's education. I was in that education class in college when they told us that WE were the professionals who knew best, and we could tell parents that. Now I will GRANT you that a variety of adults can recognize gifts in children that a parent may not or may not have any experience to recognize, but that is not the same as assuming their knowledge takes precedent over the parents. I often work with kids whose parents have unreal expectations. But my job is to do my job, and teach the best way I know how. I've sat down with parents and said "This isn't working, and this child is NOT ready for this class." I've sat down with parents and said "Please don't hold this child back from that experience." I've sat down with kids and said "The parents you have are the parents you have. How can we make the best of this?" As a parent I've sat with teachers and said "What do you think is going on here?" But I will NEVER tell a parent that I know their child better than they do, because that's just not true.
There are teachers who actively leverage students away from their parents. They ask students to question their parents' beliefs without asking them to question their parents about those beliefs. It sounds like it's a lesson in asking students to think for themselves, but these teachers are really asking students to let teachers think for them.
Drama is a very effective teacher, and TV is full of anti-family values. One could hope that schools would be able to say to students: "What you see on TV is make-believe. It's not real. People can't behave that way in real life and get away with it. Stop watching that. We don't act that way here, we don't dress that way here." But I'm afraid that the values of TV producers have found an audience in teachers, who surprisingly, can't think for themselves.
I want schools to tell kids that teens shouldn't be dating, that dating is reserved for adults who have something to offer another person, including the means to pay rent on a place of their own and transportation to get there after a failed date. I want K-12 schools to tell students they are much too young to be worrying about their sexuality, that they have to get many more parts of their lives in order before they can worry about having sex. I want schools to tell kids that the first person they have sex with ought to be the last person they have sex with, barring the death of a life partner. I want schools to tell students that sex produces children, and that a marriage built to love and protect children should precede sex.
That's the ideal, and that's what we should be teaching. If you don't think this is a topic for public education, that it belongs in churches and homes, then you're right. Parents SHOULD be the primary educators of their children. I have written elsewhere that K-12 education should be directed by parents who choose which philosophy they want their kids to have, and that it's impossible to teach from a values-neutral viewpoint. Every church should have a K-12 educational program. Parents should be able to choose which ones educate their kids.
Go here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hRGZLSVph3A to view the call to withdraw your children from public schools.
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